PERMISSION TO GRIEVE PLEASE MA'AM
I can feel anger and frustration
inside of me. The last two weeks have shown grief on a global scale, it’s been
inescapable, it’s on the radio, all over social, on every tv channel, you can’t
even order your online shopping without seeing a nod to ‘her majesty’.
There
have been orderly queues for hours upon hours to pay one’s final respects.
Hundred and thousands of pretty flowers (& marmalade sandwiches), have been
laid neatly giving condolences to ‘our Queen.’
We
saw Kings, Queens, Princes and Princess’ impeccably dressed as they gave thanks
to the millions of well wishers who travelled to London to pay their final
respects.
It’s
all very neat and tidy, yet those of us in our gang, (bereaved parents and
siblings) know that grief is anything but neat, tidy, pretty and orderly. Its a
tangled mess.
We
also know it’s a small circle that show love and support when our child or
sibling dies (& that can tail off very quickly).
It’s
the opposite to what we’ve seen on a global scale over the last few weeks. No
one wants to talk about our grief, Very rarely do we have permission to grieve
- certainly not in public, few know what to say, more people ignore us than
engage with us. We sometimes lose those closest to us - they want us to be how
we were before. Grief has a nasty habit of changing who we are.
I’m
so fascinated by this public display of grief for someone so few have met. I
wish wholeheartedly that grieving parents and siblings are able to grieve as
freely as we’ve seen over these last few weeks. It would make us feel a lot
less isolated than we already are.
Sending peace and love to all that haven’t chosen to be ‘in this gang.’
xxx
